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    venting, girl problems

    im in relationship limbo right now and it's driving me ****ing crazy.

    i have been dating this girl for like 6 months and i am totally smitten. she's fun, beautiful, and smart. the one i thought i was going to marry. so anyway, we're a little different. im the punk kid, tattoos, piercings, and she's totally the small town preppy girl. she loves godsmack, and i like agent orange as the song goes...but we have always gotten along great. i can chill with her hippie polo friends, and she gets along great with all my punks and burnouts. it was perfect! so i thought.

    2 weeks ago, im closing up the club we run around 2:30 am and taking the bands to a friends house to stay and she calls me on the cell telling me we need to talk. keep in mind, she has been out all night partying, so she came by the club twice to say hey and stuff. so im like... ?

    so i meet her at the house, she's crying, says she's not 100% sure of our relationship, doesn't know what she wants to do, misses her friends, and thinks we need time apart. GREAT...so im getting dumped.

    now this girl CONSTANTLY talks about when, where, we are getting married, what to name our kids, etc. i mean, im talking 2 days before this happens. i think everything is gravy. then out of the ****ing blue, i get this ****. it's been two weeks, we cry when we see each other about 2 times a week. she still calls every day. she still wants to go to nopi together...but we are broken up. we act like we are still an item when we are together (i.e. still screwing), but who the **** knows what's going on.

    so here i am. miserable. ****it, i have too much **** to clean on my car this weekend to stress.

    __________________
    a.k.a. benf000

    support your local punk rock scene!

    #2
    do the right thing... post nekkid pictures of her on the internet!

    Well this is the point where I will share my "rule of 3" with you. You can't find a girl thats not nice, smart, attractive, and not psycho. Not saying she's psycho, but talking marriage and then 2 days later saying hell no is a whole new story.

    I'd almost wonder if there was someone else. Maybe she's wanted to break it off for a while and it took her being drunk to do it cause she knew she couldn't do it sober.

    Girls are hard as hell to figure out, give her some time, but it sounds like you need to take your time away too. I always say people break up and they're still near each other. I'd suggest talking with her and taking a few weeks off and not seeing each other at all. Then get together and tell each other how you feel. Being open like that can be tough, but in the long run it'll be for the better.

    Sucks to hear man, I hope things work out for you.
    2002 Ford Focus ZX3
    1987 Mazda 323
    1993 Protege LX (coming soon)

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      #3
      Is she knocking some one else or is someone filling her mind up with bull **** because they are jealous of you and think you are different. If you want things to work, you can't go on like this and need to distance yourself a little. No sex two days a week nor calls every day. It's kind of like a separation when someone is married and what you guys are doing is not making things better. Spend time apart to think about it without contacting one another and then she may come back to you with open arms.

      She probably really likes you and most likely a friend whether male or female is filling her head with ideas of you being the bad guy in a case where you aren't. I would do that and set a date to meet and discuss things from that point on (no two weeks, at least give it a month!) If it's meant to be, things will turn around. With her calling you and telling you the bs and you talking to her every day when she calls is kind of her saying, I can't be with you or don't know if I want to, but as for now, things are on my terms. That's not cool to do to you. Spend time apart for a while with no contact and sees what happens. Then get back on a certain date and re-evaluate the relationship. That is my 2 cents!
      2001 ES (Featured at SoundDomain)

      Pioneer/SoundStream/JBL/Coustic/Elemental Designs/Focal/
      KnuKonceptz/Lightning Audio/SoundQuest/Tiff/
      Gel America/Dynamo Deep Cycle Battery/
      Groundkit

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        #4
        she might just be under stress from some part of the relationship and need her time alone. She cares about you but she isnt sure where she wants it to go. I had the same problem with Chris. He wanted to get married and I wasnt ready because Im only 19 and then I came to the relisation that he wasnt the one for me and it was hard to break things off because I cared for him but it was for the better...but that was 3 years of realtionship. (you met him when I came up). Im not saying that she doesnt think you are the one. But sometimes when people relise that they are going to have to give up a lot to be with one person for the rest of their lives then they tend to freak out.
        Sagaris

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          #5
          Originally posted by Motegi
          then I came to the relisation that he wasnt the one for me
          And Blue is?!?!?!?!

          :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

          Oh did I SAY THAT?!?!?!
          2001 ES (Featured at SoundDomain)

          Pioneer/SoundStream/JBL/Coustic/Elemental Designs/Focal/
          KnuKonceptz/Lightning Audio/SoundQuest/Tiff/
          Gel America/Dynamo Deep Cycle Battery/
          Groundkit

          Comment


            #6
            stop trying to hook me up. I like being single.
            Sagaris

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              #7
              Don't call her for like 2 or 3 days or so ... do the disapearing roll.. If she really cares , she will come looking for you ..

              If a women says she needs space. **** .... give her plenty off it ..
              bruce
              photo album|photo album 2 (pbase)

              dbest1a AT yahoo DOT com

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Motegi
                stop trying to hook me up. I like being single.
                I am just picking on you! You are a cool gal!
                2001 ES (Featured at SoundDomain)

                Pioneer/SoundStream/JBL/Coustic/Elemental Designs/Focal/
                KnuKonceptz/Lightning Audio/SoundQuest/Tiff/
                Gel America/Dynamo Deep Cycle Battery/
                Groundkit

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Motegi
                  stop trying to hook me up. I like being single.
                  yeah, maybe ill like it too....lol.


                  all very good advice so far that i will definately take to heart. Right now though, she's still going to nopi, so everybody be nice, she'd kill me if she knew i posted this....
                  a.k.a. benf000

                  support your local punk rock scene!

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Dude, I dealt with a similar situation... in the end I eventually cut her off cause I came to my senses and ended the use and abuse crap that was happening... and now (like a year later) we do the once in a while call or e-mail and whatnot...

                    anyways, while this stuff was goin on (her calling and wanting her booty call AKA the friends with benifits stuff), I slowly pulled away from her and she got pissed and was decided to start talking bout why she made that decision. she gave a lot of BS, but by then I realized I had enough of being used and abused. finally she confided that knew she couldn't deal with a commitment, but still didn't want to be alone. She did like me a lot, but knew that it wasn't gonna go any farther. (but she just couldn't get enough of me... haha ) so she wanted to end it, but she still liked the idea of having someone there whenever she wanted... I hope its not the same sit for you.. cause it sux when you realize how much you are being taken advantage of.

                    so I guess my suggestion is to start to pull away... and ask if she wants to talk bout whats goin on after a few days... but thats my own experience and 2 cents... good luck bro

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                      #11
                      Its these things right here that I worry about everyday sometimes... my parents love her more than they do me i think.. they like threaten me if i even thought of hte idea of breaking up wtih her... I mean i love her... but god if it ever ends(hopefully not) its gonna suck so much

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                        #12
                        well, im making it worse, and i feel worse. i keep going back. i have got to phase her out. this is killling me.
                        a.k.a. benf000

                        support your local punk rock scene!

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Before initiating the divorce, my entire family loved my ex. It made it that harder!! The didn't see the problems behind closed doors. It still sucks and I still dream of her occasionally thinking we are back together and every thing was like it was when we first met. That and we were financially stable with two incomes versus one. I don't have roommates making things more difficult financially. I did what I had to do though because we weren't happy and couldn't go on like that!
                          2001 ES (Featured at SoundDomain)

                          Pioneer/SoundStream/JBL/Coustic/Elemental Designs/Focal/
                          KnuKonceptz/Lightning Audio/SoundQuest/Tiff/
                          Gel America/Dynamo Deep Cycle Battery/
                          Groundkit

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by benzero
                            yeah, maybe ill like it too....lol.


                            all very good advice so far that i will definately take to heart. Right now though, she's still going to nopi, so everybody be nice, she'd kill me if she knew i posted this....
                            So calling her a bitch and slappin her is out of the question?

                            lol. Take it in stride. And when you think about going to see her stop yourself. Its hard but use some self control
                            Sagaris

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by Motegi
                              So calling her a bitch and slappin her is out of the question?

                              lol. Take it in stride. And when you think about going to see her stop yourself. Its hard but use some self control
                              i know, i know. actually, **** is getting worse, so she might not be coming to nopi.

                              i might just be a loner....a rebel....
                              a.k.a. benf000

                              support your local punk rock scene!

                              Comment

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